I know everybody is posting about their feelings about Neil Gamain lately, but I’m having trouble putting my feelings into words.
So I’ll let Neil say it for me:
I’m not going to spend my time here raging. Plenty of people are doing that, probably more eloquently or entertainingly than I could. For many, I think the anger comes from a very personal space, because we honestly believed he was the man he seemed to be from that quote in 2018.
He’s not the first of my literary heroes to be revealed to be a monster, but in terms of heinousness he is currently in first place. And that’s a contest nobody should want to win.
It wasn’t just Gaiman’s stories that influenced me, it was his essays and his interviews. Along with Terry Pratchett, Stephen King, and Harlan Ellison, he is one of the authors whose work shaped me as a writer.
But more than that, his words shaped me as a person. And that’s where the sting hurts most.
Regardless of where your thoughts land on separating the art from the artist, it’s going to be harder when you believed (wrongly) that you knew the person in question.
It’s a common enough illusion. For example, they found people who watched and enjoyed the show Friends had the same parts of their brain stimulated as they did by actually hanging out with their own friends. Part of you believes that waitress’ smile is genuine and not just because she’s at work.
And when you see lots of interviews or read personal essays from someone, you believe you are getting to know them… but you’re really just getting to know the parts they want you to know about them.
Which we all do. I mean, how often do you hear of a terrible criminal being arrested and even the people close to them are shocked and in disbelief? Chances are, they’re not faking it.
All this is a very roundabout way to say that we should never see others as a champion of our beliefs.
And not just because they might fail to live up to those expectations. No, the real reason is because it takes the burden off of us to be that champion… because someone else is doing it for us.
It allows us to cheer from the crowds and wave a placard with their name on it, providing moral support while they do battle against the injustices of the world. And no wonder. It’s a scary fight. That other guy in the ring is frickin huge.
But if a hero of ours isn’t the person we believe them to be, then it is up to us to be that person.
Put down the placard and step into the ring.
Your opponent awaits.
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